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(Note: I’m a female customer sitting in a pub. I’m approached by another male customer while I read a book.)
Male customer: “Hello, my name is ***.”
Me: “That’s nice.”
Male customer: “So can I have your number?”
Me: “Oh. Actually, I’m gay.”
Male customer: “You want to have sex with women?”
Me: “Well, not right now. Right now, I just want to read my book.”
Male customer: “That’s bulls***! If you’re a lesbian then you want to have sex with women!”
Me: “Honestly, I just want to read my book.”
Male customer: “You’re lying to me, that’s very rude! I’m going to complain!”
Male customer, to a waitress: “That girl over there is being really rude. I want you to do something, it’s disturbing my day. She just lied to me and told me that she was a lesbian, and now she’s mocking me.”
Waitress: “What am I supposed to do about that? Make her straight?”
Male customer: “Just do something about it!”
Waitress, to me: “Hello, there.”
Me: “Hello. I’m sorry about him.”
Waitress: “Oh, it’s no problem! So, can I have your number?”
Male customer: *looks horrified*
Me: “Er, yeah, sure. Here.”
(I write my number on a napkin and she takes it, still smiling.)
Waitress, to male customer: “See? She’s a lesbian.”
Male customer: “That’s not what I wanted you to do! I didn’t want you to ask her out, I wanted you to make her leave! I demand to speak to your manager!”
Waitress: “Oh, he’s just popped out. I can get his boyfriend for you though if you want?”
Male customer: *storms out cursing*
(It turned out that the waitress was kidding about her manager, but she wasn’t kidding about asking me out!)
(via notalwaysright.com )
What's wrong with our society.
| Kim Kardashian: | I'd like to marry this dude and spend $10 million dollars on a publicity wedding please oh and then 72 days later I'd like a divorce |
| America: | Well sure why not? |
| Britney Spears: | I want to get hitched in a chapel in Vegas and have the marriage annulled fifty-five hours later because I didn't know what the hell I was doing |
| America: | Whatever you want! |
| Carmen Electra: | I want to get married in Vegas to this basketball player and then annul the marriage nine days later cuz we were both drunk lololololololololol |
| America: | Okay, sounds like fun! |
| Gay couple: | We would like to get married and spend our lives together and possibly adopt unwanted children to give them a good home and - |
| America: | WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU IDIOTS THAT IS DISGUSTING AND WRONG YOU DEFILE THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE SO GTFO |
: chunkybuttjesus: I just feel like I should make my own post about it... ↘
I just feel like I should make my own post about it because I’m really pissed off
Dear Tumblr, I am a gay male person
I don’t appreciate you treating me, and people like me, like objects
I’ve seen you find out Mark Gatiss is gay and then proceed to ask him who he ships in…
(Source: poachy)
Why I Love My Mother
| Politician at door: | (blah blah blah)...and my strong commitment to traditional family values, as my wife of 28 years will attest. |
| Shade's mom: | Sir, I don't care if you have orgies every Tuesday night so long as you get your job done. |
| Politician: | ... |
| Shade's mom: | Also, if "traditional family values" is a sneaky way of saying "anti-gay marriage stance," you should know that my daughter is bisexual, and if I never get to cry at her wedding because some law you passed made her wedding illegal, I will personally see that your wife of 28 years has a lesbian awakening in time for you to discover the virtues of traditional divorce. |
| Politician: | ...you have yourself a nice day, m'am. |
